tears

i cried this morning at staff prayer. it was a worship morning. i am not sure why i cried.
it might have been that i didnt know the words and felt lost and alone and just wanted to go home NOW
or it might have been that i didnt know the words and worried that i'll never fit here and i want to fit here so badly.
it might have been that, in spite of not knowing the words, i feel like i do fit here and sometimes i do not want to leave. and i only have half a year left.
or it might have been the release of a the tensions and a thousand little tears that have been building up inside of me for all those reasons and they finally came out because when i worship i feel safe and my guard comes down.
or i might just be crazy.